My brain has turned into oatmeal...

This morning I forgot breakfast. Then I left my house with neither socks nor children. Clearly I am suffering from mama exhaustion.

Scientists agree that as many as 12 out of every 10 new mothers suffer from mama exhaustion. The other 6 who claim they have energy are simply lying.

By the end of this post, you may be suffering from it to. Here are the symptoms:

1. Failure at socks. 
2. A tendency to repeat yourself.
3. An inability to perform basic calculations.
4. A poor grasp of science.
5. A desire to tell boring anecdotes, repeatedly.
6. The consumption of unholy quantities of coffee to no avail. 
7. A compulsion to binge on 'Homeland' and other TV oatmeal. 
8. A verbal collapse to nothing but complaining language.  
9. A tendency to repeat yourself. 
10. A tendency to repeat yourself. 

These effects are temporary, which is a relief because I just walked outside unbreakfasted and sockless. 

There are other symptoms I'm forgetting to list, but I can't find the words right now. As Steve Martin once said: "Some people have a way with words. Other people...not have way." 

I'm told these effects are temporary. This is a relief because my feet are starting to turn blue. I could sure use some socks. Now...where are my children?