Birthday letter

Dear Niece,

You are one. Hooray!

At this age, you may be battling certain frustrations, like:

1. Aiming a spoon at the correct orifice. 

   

   It gets better...and worse. 

2. Copious boogers vs precious little nose space. 
3. A damp backside that remains stubbornly damp, even when you crawl like hell away from it. 
4. Occasional abandonment by PARENT-GODS OF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE. 
5. Not having your own spaceship and CONTROL OF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE. 

You have my sympathy. But trust me - there are many advantages to being the magical age of one. For instance:

1. Your lack of spoon precision means that anti-cake diets are many years off. 
2. When your nose runs, it is somebody else's problem. 
3. You can pee anywhere without being arrested. Take it from this pregnant non-boy: this gets very complicated later on. 
4. When PARENT-GODS OF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE momentarily abandon you to take a grown-up pee (see item 3), they are sure to come back soon because you are that darned cute. 
5. You don't have to make car payments on the spaceship. And in practice, running the ENTIRE UNIVERSE mostly involves washing crap and filling in forms. 

Happy birthday Nichte! May the year ahead bring you more spoon precision and fewer boogers.

With love always,

Tanta